autoimmune disease health update

autoimmune disease health update

Kimba Likes | autoimmune disease health update

Recently I shared a selfie where I not only looked tired, grumpy and sore, I looked defeated.  Like I’d given up.

It kinda did defeat me, looking at the selfies.  Is that how people see me? How do I see myself? Am I just kidding myself that I’m coping?

Life with an invisible illness and chronic pain isn’t easy.  It’s a hell of a lot easier than living with a disease that could kill you.  I know that.  I feel guilty about that.  But it is important to understand that acknowledging my own pain isn’t diminishing anyone else’s pain.

It is also important to reflect on how living with illness affects you emotionally as well as physically.  As well as the people you live with and love.

Why did I share it? Because I try to keep it real.

Here’s my image and the words I shared with it.  Thank you to those whom these words resonated with, and who reached out to me. You have no idea what that means to me.

Kimba Likes my autoimmune disease health update

I wanted to take a selfie so I could share the fabulous flamingo matchy matchy thing I’ve got going on today. Because flamingos. And matchy matchy.

I couldn’t find one where I didn’t look cross, tired, sore, sad or a combination of all of them. And I took a tonne of them. Believe me.

But I’m sharing it anyway. Because this is me. And this is how I feel. Cross, tired, sad, sore, exhausted. With pink lipstick and a hairbow.

That is life with an invisible illness and chronic pain and limited mobility.

It’s the big things, like making a choice between being able to drive my kid to school or take painkillers – because I can’t do both. It’s forcing myself to get out of bed every morning – and sometimes I don’t.

It’s the little things like drinking decaf and not drinking wine because the side effects are inflammation and pain.

It’s knowing that I can only do what I can do but feeling like I’m letting everyone down.

It’s feeling guilty for answering honestly when someone says “how are you?” Because it’s a thing people say, not a thing people mean.

It’s all those things and more. Hopefully my long awaited specialist appointment this week will help. I’ll have answers and clarity and a treatment plan. Until then, I have much love and support. And flamingos and pink lipstick.

I met with my rheumatologist this week; the man with the plan. He’s started me on a course of medication, and I’ve have blood taken for a horde of tests to work out exactly what I have, so we know how to treat it.

autoimmune disease health update

I was diagnosed with autoimmune disease more than a decade ago. After being in remission for a few years, the symptoms have returned. Plus they’ve brought a few extras with them.  I love buy one get one free deals but not when it comes to illness, thank you very much!

I’m still tired, grumpy and sore.  But I’m not defeated.  Never defeated.

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