I want us all to get our body loving on and love ourselves. It’s so very important. It’s important for our own self esteem and for that of future generations. We might not think we are role models … but that is exactly what we are.
I’m a pretty confident person. Every single day, I share photos of me on social media as part of Styling You’s #everydaystyle project. During Frocktober, I’ve been rocking a frock to raise funds and awareness for the Ovarian Cancer Research Foundation. More full length photos. Every single day. That’s a lot of Kimba all over socialite media.
Look, I’m not delusional. I know I don’t have the perfect body. Far from it. After so many years of autoimmune disease-caused chronic illness, I’ve lost a lot of strength and still find it hard to exercise as often as I’d like. There’s a lot more junk in the trunk. I have curves on my curves.
I’m the biggest I’ve ever been in my life – apart from when I was up the duff with Boyo. And you know what? I’m so much happier being a size 14 41 year old than I ever was being a size 8 22 year old.
I have a more defined sense of individual style, a bigger budget and way more self confidence. I have to confess that comfort plays a bigger role in my wardrobe decisions. The concept of a capsule wardrobe is one that has still escaped my magpie tendencies, but I do subscribe to the theory of investing in quality staples and basics, and updating my wardrobe seasonally with cheaper show pony pieces.
I know how to dress and I know the power of a few fashion magic tricks. Like a smoothing slip under a fitted dress. Like a properly fitted bra – the higher the boobs, the longer the torso. Like avoiding suck ’em knickers like the plague – seamless are the way to go. The flattering effects of a little cleavage, a defined waist and a cuffed pant for a little ankle action cannot be underestimated.
More than that, I have the self confidence that comes from knowing that I am truly loved and appreciated by a good man. A man who loves me and appreciates the changes my body has undergone in the 15 years since we first set eyes on each other. He thought I was too skinny when we first met, bless him.
That tiny teenaged and 20-something me thought she was too fat to wear a bikini in public. I started wearing a bikini in my mid 30s. It hit me – I had wasted all those years of fabulous slimness. I didn’t want to look back at 40 and mourn the body I had at 30. Or 40. Or 50.
But … and it’s a big one. Baby got back! I like big butts and I cannot lie. OK, back to serious mode. Even with all this body loving awareness, I still have moments of weakness. I still have moments when I think I’m more Lumpy Space Princess and less lovely lady lumps.
I had one just this week. I just love Popbasic^ and their fabulous capsule collections. I ordered the Alice Collection, consisting of the Forever Dress, a long sleeved black fitted midi dress (as well as the gorgeous Marais Key Necklace and Gold Lock Bangle). As I’m not a fan of bodycon dressing, I ordered the XL so it would be oversized on me. Except, well, it wasn’t. It was bodycon fitted.
Layered over opaque leggings and a Metalicus fitted slip dress, I glanced in the mirror as I ran down the stairs for a school bound Boyo to snap my Frocktober Everyday Style photos. Looking OK, I thought. Yep, that’ll do.
Posting the pictures gave me a quick moment of should I or shouldn’t I. Then the regret really started to hit. I could see lumps. And bumps. I knew they were there, but did the world need to know that too?
I was after neither praise nor compliments nor affirmation – but that was what I was lucky enough to receive. I straightened my shoulders, smiled and told myself “girlfriend, you might have lumps on your bumps and swerves on your curves, but you are beyond fabulous”. Each and every of my lines and scars and bumps and wobbly bits are part of me. They make up who I am.
I don’t love my mummy tummy but I simply wouldn’t be who I am without it. I damn well earned that mummy tummy by nurturing my darling Boyo aka EnormoBaby inside my body. I’m not that keen on the lines and creases on my face – but they represent the good times (and the bad times too, just quietly). Luckily, I have more laugh lines than frown lines.
It got me thinking. We all have days like this, yeah? No matter how confident we are? We’ve all said to others “girlfriend, you’re on crack. You look fabulous!’ when they’ve been down on themselves. Well, or words to that effect.
So I’m making a pact here. The next time I feel down about myself because of the way I perceive my body looks, I’m going to quote myself. To myself. Because that’s how I roll. I’d love for you to join me. After all, we can’t expect others to love us if we don’t love ourselves first. Am I right?
Join me in my Mindful Living Body Loving Love Yourself campaign?
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