Have you had “the talk” with your kids yet? Are you dreading it? It’s hard to find the right balance of detail, fact and vital not to giggle frantically when discussing it rationally with your child. Here’s our story.
A couple of years ago, aged about six and a half, Boyo started expressing a great deal of interest in where babies come from. We were heading off on a road trip to Canberra, and the Welshman and Boyo stocked up on books for the trip from the local second hand bookshop. One of the books they bought was the classic “Where Did I Come From?”.
On the way to Canberra – boy, it can be a loooong trip – we had a fairly high level, ie, not too detailed, discussion about how babies are made. There was some discussion about sperm and eggs and I think one of us may have even used that embarrassing phrase we possibly remembered from our own childhoods – “when two people love each other very, very much …”
Fortunately, he wasn’t too interested in how the sperm actually get to meet the egg – in our case there were doctors and test tubes involved – but he was absolutely fascinated that women are born with their eggs inside them, but men make their “sperms”.
As we discussed the testicles being a “sperm factory”, he declared that he could feel it, and it did indeed feel like tickling. He started singing “there’s a party in my balls, there’s a party in my balls …”. Gods, I am forever grateful that the Welshman was driving, for I believe I may have had to run off the road, so convulsed by giggles was I.
Luckily, he got bored by this pretty soon, and was more interested in playing DS games. At his age, I used to suffer from terrible car sickness, so I’m terribly impressed with his ability to read and play games on the road.
We did have a chat to him saying that it is important not to discuss this with other children, unless they bring it up first with you, as their parents might not be ready to discuss it with them yet.
Imagine my surprise when one of the Gorgeous Girls told me about a very interesting discussion Boyo had had whilst on the walk home from school to his playdate. Her children were not yet aware of where babies came from, having not yet expressed any interest in this particular subject matter. Well, they weren’t before the walk home anyway.
When I had a further little chat with Boyo regarding this brazen breaking of the rules we’d discussed, he fixed with me a withering look and informed me that he was discussing it with his friend’s mother. “Mum, she has had three babies. I’m pretty sure she already knows where babies come from”, he told me, in a tone that left no doubt that I was an idiot.
What can one say to that?!
Have you had the chat yet? Do you remember cringing with embarrassment when your parents discussed the birds and bees with you?